there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Everclear isn't food dammit
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
