Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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