It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
