Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Randomize
