margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
