Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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