Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
