If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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