So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Life without a bra equals bliss.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
