The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
