it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
