Well douche your snatch and let's go!
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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