Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
