I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
