SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
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