just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Randomize
