In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Randomize
