I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
