I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
