I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
