Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
