I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
