He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
Randomize
