:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
