Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Randomize
