ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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