Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
