If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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