found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
