just tell him i said nine months
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
