it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
