i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
No I am not eating basil off your cock
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
