Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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