I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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