Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize