he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
she peed on how many people?
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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