i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
