Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
