check it out our google latitudes are spooning
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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