i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
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