i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
