Do you still have your period?
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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