let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
