I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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