I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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