And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
