Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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