We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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