Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Randomize
