i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
